TUH Talks: How to Be Happy!

How to Be Happy

In this month’s Tallaght University Hospital (TUH) Talks Health Column, Dr Valerie Twomey, Clinical Neuropsychologist and Head of Psychology at TUH, explains how to live a fulfilling life. Dr Twomey is also an Associate Clinical Lecturer at Trinity College Dublin.

How to Be Happy

Summer is here, the sun is shining, and the smiles are beaming. So, what makes us happy? Happiness is something that most of us want in life, but it’s also probably the most misunderstood emotion we have in human life. We chase it constantly and often believe we will find it in achievements, possessions, and other people.

But Happiness isn’t something we get. It’s a practice. And like any practice, it can be learned, and you need to keep practising it.

Lesson No. 1: Stop Chasing the Wrong Things

One of the biggest barriers to happiness is the “when-then” trap: When I get that job, then I’ll be happy.

When I lose the weight, then I’ll feel good about myself.

My colleague, Professor Brendan Kelly, Consultant Psychiatrist at TUH and author of The Science of Happiness, tells us that we are wired to dread disappointment more than we want to be happy. So, we chase things to avoid disappointment instead of pursuing the things that make us most happy.

Psychologist and Neuroscientist, Professor Bruce Hood, in his book, also titled The Science of Happiness, warns us that we are always chasing yet never getting there.

He says happiness is less about specific things in life and more about feeling content and satisfied.

It’s all about people, connection and movement

Strong social connections are the most reliable predictor of a happy life.

The quality of our relationships matters more than wealth or fame.

Our community and connection are key to our long-term happiness.

Our tendency to compare ourselves to others, which at one point in time was useful for social connectedness, now only fuels dissatisfaction and disappointment in an age of social media reels.

The solution to this is not isolation, but a deeper and more intentional connection.

Call a friend. Have dinner with family. Put the phone down and be truly present.

Lesson No. 2: Know Your Low Point — and Plan Beyond It

One of the more surprising insights from Professor Kelly’s work is that unhappiness follows a predictable trend.

Research suggests that around the age of 47 tends to be the low point of life satisfaction for many people.

Knowing this matters, because it tells us and teaches us to be patient, this is a shared human experience that too passes.

Lesson No. 3: Get Out of Your Own Head

Being overly self-focused is a major source of unhappiness.

When we focus too much on our own needs and behaviours, obsessing over our inadequacies and measuring ourselves against others, we become prisoners of our own stories.

The science of happiness consistently points us in the opposite direction: towards other people, towards purpose, towards something larger than the self.

Being grateful, showing acts of generosity, have all been shown to shift us out of self-absorption and into a richer engagement with life.

Finally…and by no means lastly: Move Your Body

Exercise is one of the most underrated mood interventions available, and it’s free!

Physical activity triggers the release of endorphins, dopamine, and serotonin, the brain’s natural feel-good chemicals.

Even a brisk 20-minute walk has been shown to reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression.

You don’t need a gym membership or a gruelling fitness routine. Just move, consistently.

Running or walking isn’t just about fitness; it’s also about community, connection, and enjoyment.

Pop along to your local Parkrun at Tymon Park, Dodder Valley Park, Corkagh Park or Marlay Park. Run, walk or even volunteer, make it a family affair, even bring the dog.

As both Professor Brendan Kelly and Professor Bruce Hood tell us, happiness is a set of principles and strategies that can be understood, practised, and built upon. Start small and start today.